Wednesday, August 20, 2014

why the #icebucketchallenge will NEVER be a waste of water

 a few days ago while scrolling through my facebook news feed I was stopped by a video of my dear friends daughter. of course I clicked play, isn't that what you do when your friends post videos of their children? wait, did she just say ALS? no way she is talking about the ALS I know. she is kind of smiling. wait, ice water - a challenge ... what??? stop. play back. yes, ALS. a bucket full of ice OVER her head and laughter. stop. volume up, all the way, play back. what...? Google search -  almost an hour later, family gathered around the computer, laughter and tears, sincere gratitude meets deep grief and my 5 year old daughter want's me to challenge her to the #icebucketchallenge. 

 ya see, ALS is not something you speak about with a smile on your face. ALS is something that you have to explain to people. let me make this a little more clear, explain to people while their is still the shock of a terminal diagnosis, or while watching someone slowly suffer through it, or while grieving the terrible loss from it and sometimes while holding back your own personal pain, tears and grief. still not clear? People don't know what ALS is.

people know about cancer, HIV & AIDS, M.S. & M.D.S. you can tell someone, 'it's stage four lung cancer,' and immediately receive support, empathy, a hug & maybe some form of nonverbal exchange that it's "okay" to cry.  not so when ALS is the diagnosis. their first has to be an education. in my personal experience, it was so important to me to explain the disease - that people understood it - how it works both inside the body and out, that all emotions had to be set aside for a moment, so that anyone actually caring enough to ask what it is, fully understands as much as they possibly can about the disease without the awful experience of having to walk through it themselves. sadly though, a lot of people would unknowingly ( at least I hope ) scrunch up their face and say "ooh" as if to say 'I've never heard of ALS, don't know what it is and sure hope I don't catch it from you'.  yup. you'd be surprised.

 so once the education has been given their is a process for those who have heard and listened to what ALS actually is. a processing of the horribleness. the horrible brevity of what someone has gone through before their passing. the heavy weight of having to watch someone walk through it. generally speaking, the conversation is just too much for most people and the explanation of the disease is where it begins and where it ends. few people will in turn ask, "how did you handle that?" "how are you handling that now?" it's just too much. it's more than people can manage to hear about & quite frankly, it's a downer. to be perfectly fair - it's straining to both hear about as well as to tell someone about it, weather you have walked through it or not. for those few times when someone has cared enough to listen to the explanation, cared enough to ask more questions, i've been too exhausted to tell them just how much it sucked. it still sucks and is somehow harder to cope with now then it was to go through it almost 20 years ago.

 so here I sit watching challenge after challenge of countless ice water buckets being dumped over the heads of strangers, friends and family a like. I cannot get enough of it. the smiles, the silliness, the laughter surrounding it all. as sad as it is that it exists, it's encouraging to hear the initials "ALS" spoken by so many people. it's being talked about. people know it is SOMETHING. people. many people. a whole new community. strangers who may just be having fun. maybe they don't understand the disease but these people make up a community. a community of support. i'm not even sure I understand it myself, i just know that is how it feels to me. while those shivering, cold, challenge participants giggle & laugh ( & sometimes swear!)  i'm feeling supported. feeling loved. feeling a sense of community. of something bigger than i am that is willing and able to make known that ALS is something. it will come, people will know how awful it really truly is, but right now, the awareness that has been achieved through such a silly act is worth far more then my explanation ever could be. dare I say, it's worth more then its weight in the water used to complete the challenge.

 can you believe some have said it a waste of water? lot's of people in fact. a waste of water. sure, your entitled to your own opinion & it sounds like you should probably not participate in the challenge. i'm gonna go so far as to say is sounds like you may also be those same people who would hear the initials ALS and scrunch up your nose and say "ooh." it's okay. we all have a tendency to fear what we don't understand. but now i'm gonna pass on a challenge to you. the challenge not to stay there. in that state of ignorance and fear. is a great place for you climb your way out of that whole. sure, I hear that my tone may sound harsh, but you gotta know that the facts are a lot more harsh then my opinion. since 1939 only one drug has been approved by the FDA to "help" those suffering from ALS. this drug, it only prolongs the life of an ALS sufferer for 2-3 months. that in and of itself is harsh & unacceptable. now please, know that I mean this in all sincerity, no harsh tone at all - I pray that you will never have to be thankful for the funds raised during the ice bucket challenge because a friend or family member of yours is dying from it. because I pray that all this money raise during this "pay in water only fundraiser" is going to help fund the fight. I am, for the first time ever, feeling encouraged that their may come a day that something can be done to actually help those suffering from ALS. so before you go posting that silly little meme about the water being wasted, please educate yourself first. please know exactly how the challenge works. please be sensitive to those of us who are effected every singe day of our lives by ALS. ask questions. keep asking questions. put yourself in the shoes of the other person. be, dare I say - tolerant? & if you are still upset that water is being used as a fundraiser, do find yourself a great organization that you feel passionately about and help them to dig wells where they are needed, or kindly donate to the communities that need to raise the funds to build those wells. being sarcastic - or passive aggressive - about anything at all is never a good way. find another way that you can positively effect another individual, or even many people.

 to those that have participated, please accept my sincere gratitude. you may never understand how healing the #icebucketchallenge has been to me, personally. thank you for simply saying those initials out loud. please keep praying for victory over this disease so that we really can #strikeoutals once and for all. & please, lets just be kind to one another, even over the tough things - especially over the tough things. this life is hard enough and kindness really does make a difference. thanks for reading :) amy

Sunday, March 24, 2013

The Baby in a Water Bubble

  gracie is not so sure about all this baby in mommas belly business. all she can understand is that a baby in mommas belly makes her very sick a lot, and that momma now reads most of her books to her while cozied up in bed. not completely bad but still, things have suddenly changed for gracie and she is not quite understanding it all. that is until i showed her *this book:
 this is a great pictorial of what goes on inside a momma when a 'baby grows in her belly.'
we have always been very honest with our children, but i gotta say, some of these pictures are a bit more detailed then her 3 year old mind needs to comprehend just yet. i want to keep the "little" in my little girl for as i long as i can. so while looking at the pictures i told her the "story" and answered her questions as best as i could, in 3 year old terms.
here are just some of the wonderful pictures in this book:

at first i really wasn't sure how much she was paying attention to the "story" and how much she really cared...until i turned on netflix and closed my eyes for a nap.
laying there for a little while i started dozing off but suddenly woke up fully to feeling her jump down from the bed and walking around to get the book from my night stand. i watched her walk back to her side of the bed, climb in and start to flip through the pages. a little nervous about what pages she would study without my supervision, i wondered if i should take it from her. the end of the book - the birth process, is very graphic and we hadn't quite talked about that yet...
then she started "reading" the book to herself, "the baby in the water bubble," she started.
'did she just say "the baby in the water bubble"?' i wondered to myself. 'i did tell her that the baby floated in a bag of water inside my belly. i guess it really does look like a bubble.'
"once upon a time, God put a baby in a water bubble and then in a mamma's tummy..." she continued.
just as innocent as i had hoped it had come across, only more so, cuz it was in her words, in her own understanding.
 i laid there beside my young daughter, so sick in my stomach, full of guilt that we had been spending so much time just laying around, wondering if she was gonna remember this time as negatively as i had feared it felt. instead, i was listening to her retell the "story" of the 'baby in a water bubble' and feeling so blessed to have her there by my side. her little voice "read" about fetal development, how the eyes change from week to week, the hands grow from tiny buds and so on and so forth. she was so enamored by it all, and here i wasn't sure if she was even paying attention.
it turned out to be one of her favorite books to read while laying in bed with momma. every once in a while she would ask from the other side of the bathroom door, "is that baby in the water bubble making you feel sick again?"  somehow hearing that question, even with my head in the toilet sick as a dog, made me laugh...or at least smile a little. 
i love the perspective kids have on things. even when we think we lay it all out a certain way, they're gonna receive it their own way. from their own life experiences and through whatever innocence we can hold on to for them. that is key here. that is something i want both all our children to hold onto, even while we are being honest with them, their innocence. it seems they either have it, or do not. once it's gone, it's gone. i pray we can continue to be open and honest with our children while taking into account their age and that not all explanations have to be as elaborate as they can be.
how have your older children responded to a growing baby belly?
how have you explained to them, the new life growing inside of you?
i'd love to hear form any mommas out there, if you are willing to share =)
*A Child Is Born by lennart nilsson
the completely new edition
ISBN: 0-440-50691-3

Saturday, March 23, 2013

what the heck happened to my body?

  where to start...first off let me start by that saying i am thankful! thankful for the blessing of being able to carry another human being inside my own. thankful for the children i have. thankful that i can walk. thankful that i have food in my kitchen. thankful that i have food in my belly. thankful that i have a loving carring husband who can and does pick up my slack. thankful for friends and family who stand by my side and help me both physically and mentally...or should i say hormonally =) i have a lot to be thankful for and i try very hard not to loose sight of any of it, especially knowing it could all be taken away with the blink of an eye. you just never know...
  okay, now that i've shown you that side of my coin, could i just take a moment and flip it over to show you the other side? to just vent a little bit?
  let me start by asking, "what the heck happened to my body?!?"  i know - i know, i'm pregnant and these things happen yada-yada-yada...but seriously...? what the heck happened!?!
  here's a quick run down on what has been going on for the last 29 weeks.
  i have HG, otherwise known as Hyperemesis gravidarum. in other words - morning, noon and night sickness ( throwing up ) during pregnancy. it effects 1% of pregnant women, i fall into that 1%. however, this pregnancy hasn't been as hard as with mikey's and gracie's pregnancies - praise the Lord! so far i haven't been hospitalized for dehydration ( yaay!! ) and at about 27 weeks i've been able to keep most foods down =) being that sick for so long has led me to laying around on the couch or in bed for a great big part of this pregnancy.
  generally speaking i love to be active! running, swimming, hiking, biking, if it's happening, i'm all in! my body has done some crazy things before but this? this is a new crazy, and i don't like it, not one bit.
  thankful that my HG has calmed down a great deal i am now dealing with strange passing out and racing heart spurts. the passing out is kind of annoying because...well ... as it was described to me by my nurse: passing out is your body's way of going on auto pilot - you loose control of your body and the primal body takes over. think about that one for a moment...loose control of your body...this is not good if you have a full bladder and a baby laying on top of it...yup - you loose control of your bladder. as if passing out in front of anyone isn't bad enough, now imagine doing so and wetting yourself on top of that. yup - talk about humbling experiences...
  i have had my heart checked by e.k.g. and a 24 hour heart monitor and nothing was found. i had blood taken and my thyroid checked and everything came up fine - thank you Lord!  although i gotta say, i really was hoping for answers and a way to avoid this happening anymore.
  the positive here is that i have warning signs i can pay attention to to keep from completely blacking out, or as i like to call it, whiting out. first i get hot - very quickly, out of the blue. second i start to sweat all over my face and back and eeew - gross! third, my vision starts to go white ( white out ) the more and more my vision gets foggy white, the closer i am to hitting the floor. since i have learned this about myself i've also learned that i can lay down - right away - on my left side to prevent my body from "switching to auto pilot" and therefore not pass out. however, i do look quite silly in the middle of anywhere i am laying, on the floor. yes. this even means the cracker isle of the local grocery food store - hahhaahh!! clean up in isle 12!
  all this adds up to where i am today, and really, the answer to my question of "what the heck happened to my body." i have been either too sick to eat, too sick to get off the couch, or so happy to be able to keep food down that i am eating everything in sight. and/or off somewhere strange laying down on my left side - hahhaahh!! gaining weight in strange places!! yes i have a baby belly - i don't mind that. i don't even mind too much the strange shape my face and upper arms take on when i'm pregnant. can i just say though, lifting my legs to walk feels a little like lifting tree trunks with each step. i know, i know, it's all part of the process and really, i'm good for it! i know i'll get back into shape. i love to run and swim laps too much to not get back in shape, once i'm feeling better.  
  seriously though, i'm reaching here, i'd love to start feeling better now!

  *insert powerful bible verse here; preferably one that reminds me of how i'm fearfully and wonderfully made or even about patience. please, someone, anyone, cause honestly,,,i'm over it - hahhaahh!! (wait, not over the bible verses, just over feeling this way - sick of feeling like poo ) *

  between the tiredness i feel simply due to pregnancy but also the extra weight of carring around tree trunks + the concern with my heart, i've been doing some thinking. i'm eating crazy amounts of mac n cheese. the waffles? yeah, they make me feel fuller for longer but their just simply isn't very much nutritional value there. yes, i drink a TON of water but i also indulge in a pitcher of kool-aid about once a month too.
  my heart health can't be too great with my sudden lack of exercise and i know for sure i don't feel too good most of the time. thinking back on when i felt my best, i was on a very strict vegan raw food diet. to say that i felt great back then is an understatement. why did i stop you ask? because i have been known to be an all or nothing gal. it was winter and i wanted soup,,,so i went off the strict diet and only looked back a few times, each time though - with fondness.
  as so begins my journey. instead of asking for a new fancy fun kitchen trash can for my birthday, i'm asking for a new fancy fun food processor for my birthday. i have been reading as much info that i can find on eating vegan and raw foods properly during pregnancy and for during breastfeeding. also, what does this look like nutritionally for my children? i am coming up with some good info but i must also say and here is what i think is important for me to doesn't have to be all or nothing.
  my plan is to do breakfast, most lunches and snack as vegan and raw as i can/want to for myself. for the rest of the family, my husband and i have decided one dinner a week will be replaced with a vegan raw food meal . it's a good start. it's feels like a healthy start for us. not everyone in the family may like it. not everyone in the family may take to it well in their body chemistry - this isn't the proper way for everyone to eat and i am planning to watch closely how my children are effected by it.
  as for these tree trunks i'm lugging around? this past week i wanted to walk a mile at least once every day. i did monday & tuesday with much success! =D wednesday i woke up feeling tired and fatigued so i did not push it. *i will always listen to my body* thursday, friday and saturday i was busy - busy - busy and in all honestly, i have to pace myself. walking a mile out of the blue while carring a suddenly large amount of weight is really a big deal. at least it feels like it to me. i am happy even if i was successful to do it 2 days out of 7 this week. it's two more days this week then i did last week.
  about my weight. i am not and never have been a numbers gal. maybe because my weight was never an issue for me. probably because i'd rather go by how i feel. that number isn't telling me anything about myself that i don't already know, just by how i feel. i've though about using a tape measure and counting inches lost. i've even thought about purchasing a scale, but really? i have a feeling that i would start being more concerned with those numbers and less concerned with how i feel. that just doesn't sound like what i'm shooting for.
  all that said, our baby is healthy and loves to lay horizontally low (yup, on top of my bladder) or on my right side. laying on my right side may just be the reason for all the ingout...? my new favorite thing to eat is ice and this blog post is loooong enough =D no, i don't feel caught up but i will try to do better with catching up and staying up to date, especially since i want to log more closely with my journey to a healthier me :)

 "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body," 1 Cor. 6:19-20

Monday, October 8, 2012

dear blog...

dear blog,
 hello ol' friend! it's been long since i've last visited. i didn't mean to leave for such a lengthy period of time. their is just so many venues for me to log our family's going's on.
 like an art journal...

how wonderfully therapeutic!
clearly, i've fallen in love with instagram =) wanna follow? our user name is: peculiarmorris under my name: amy marie. life documented in pictures is ever so much fun!
i've also been doing a TON of around the house projects. some of which i plan to blog about...once they are completed. here is a quick preview...
this is the crib springs from the kids old crib, soon to hold a few black & whites of our family, clipped with ever so tiny clothes pins. thank you pinterest!

these beauties are part of the making of our home school room =) which leads me to the fact that we are in the full swing of both kindergarten and pre. k as well as attending home school co'op. i've tried to take a picture of both mikey and gracie every friday after co'op, but let's face it, some days i just simply forget :( here's the first day...
mikey enjoys co'op a great deal, but it sure makes for a tired boy by noon!

gracie is still warming up to co'op, here she is trying to be excited about her first day. note: she too is completely bushed by noon =)

haven't they grown so much since last i posted?
this past summer my husband and i started running again!
watching him encourage our kids along the path, weather it's the running path or the path God guides them to in life, it's just such a blessing! He really is the man of my dreams and the only man i could ever want to "do life" with!

yes that is a roll of t.p. in the stroller bag - running is a great way to clear out my sinuses & of course i keep it classy with t.p. =D
running just makes us all feel soo good!
 i even started running the couch 2 5K program with a good friend of mine. i cannot say enough good things about that program!
 i. LOVE. it!
 if you've ever wanted to start running, have no previous experience, or just don't know where to start, might i suggest this c 2 k program? basically you start out running at 60 seconds and walking at 90 second intervals. over an eight week period it gently guides you into running a 5k in around 20 minutes.
one cold & windy saturday afternoon i really struggled to run. i just couldn't catch my breath! it was sooo frustrating because had done such a great run just the saturday before. my running partner, molly, was so gracious and walked with me until i caught my breath and off we'd go again. i was so upset with myself! i couldn't understand why in the world i suddenly couldn't all. molly suggested i go see my doctor to be sure i didn't have asthma or walking pneumonia. by the time i saw my doctor every single breath i took was painful :( turns out that i DO have asthma and running in the cold, without using an inhaler, is a great way to give yourself a lung infection.
 now. i. know.
after my infection was over i still had NO energy. i was so looking forward to getting up off my bum and hitting the streets with molly again, but it just seemed like this infection was kicking my bum instead of going away. it no longer hurt to breath but i just wanted to sleep MOST of the day. after a few more frustrating weeks of this we decided their might be another reason for this sudden lack of energy...
yup, that's two positive home pregnancy test =D the reason i have no energy to run & the desire to nap a good 3 hours every afternoon is because my body is busy making another human being! what an honor and a blessing to think that God has chosen us to give life to another person!
...about those crib springs hanging on the living room wall... 
haahhaahh! isn't that just my luck!?!
and so dear blog i haven't forgotten you, i've just gotta pick and choose what i do with my time, and i just simply can't do it all. so while i may be away for lengthy periods of time, it's not that i have forgotten you, just that i may have the sudden urge to paint a new color on the wall, pick some thing up off the side of the road and re'purpose it for our home; or cut, paint, paste, staple or sew an old fashion journal.
 life seems to be moving at an unexpectedly fast pace and i'm trying to sit comfortably in each and every moment, trusting that each and every step of the way has been ordained by a God who Loves and Cares and desires to be part of each and every step. prayerfully with every step, i will remember that even though the feet at the end of my legs are attached to my body, this body is not my own and these feet do surely want to tread where the All Mighty leads.   
all that said dear blog, i will try to remember you more often and stop by for a visit more frequently. especially since i'm entering a time in life where i generally tend to go more inward then out.
i'm sure their will be a lot that i will want to remember about these next few months so i do hope to see you again soon - until then, dear blog, i will be living each moment for Him, in Him.
1 corinthians 6:19-20
you are not your own; you were bought at a price. therefore honor God with you body.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

The answers are blowing in the wind!

Last week i had a few extra small friends over to play. The thing with watching my girl friends children is that, well all the kids play sooooo well together, i get MORE time to myself. Isn't that ironic?
So while all the kiddos were splashing about in our puddle pool, i got to sit undisturbed for quite a while reading my bible. Not to worry, i was sitting poolside within an arms reach of all the kids =)
After a nice while, two of the smalls had to take potty breaks. So out of the water with everyone and up to the top of the hill to play. That way i could be sure no one would be tempted back into the water while i was inside for a few minutes.
A quick potty break and back to the fun, when i notice my old, most favorite bible, most of genesis & exodus lose with age, blown apart and throughout three different yards! My stomach in my feet and my heart in my throat - i had no idea which pages to chase after first.
"Children!" I shouted. "My bible! Please help me!" It was all i could think of and of course the wind kept blowing and the kids just stood there, blank faced and starring. "Please! Help me find all the pages!"
"Why is your bible like that?"
"Where should we start?"
"Just get another bible."
All questions and no action. I. am. frantic.
Running - chasing - gulping back tears - grabbing pages - genesis here - exodus there - wait, did Leviticus also blow away?
It wasn't until i started chasing my precious pages around throughout my yard and the neighbors that the children started to help. Reminding them of the mostly invisible boundary lines separating front and back yards, i run for the front as i see the table of contents snagging across the street. Checking to be sure no one was following me, i cross to gather more of genesis from tall meadow grass.
checking books and chapters and verses to see what i have, and what is missing, i hear peter, paul and mary singing in my head ' - the answers, my friend, are blowing in the wind, the answers are blowing in the wind-'
i was reminded of a man (whose name has escaped me) long ago imprisoned for his faith in God, and made to read political propaganda. a lot of time had past for that man and still he clung to God, wondering if he was to rot in prison and be abused for his faith, for the rest of his life. one day he prayed for God to show him if He was real or he would submit to his captors. soon after that prayer the man was cleaning out the latrine and what does he find? pages of the bible, used as toilet paper. the man asks to clean the latrine every day so that he can continue to collect the pages, soiled from the latrine, but precious tokens of love from the God who never left or forsake him. i was reminded of countless men and women who are in countries where the bible is illegal - what would they give to get their hands on just one of these page? i was reminded of a man in India who doesn't even know how to read, let alone even read in english, but has one page of this precious book and kisses it daily.
i hear the little girls voice in my head, "why not just get another bible? i saw two others in your living room," and my heart is shattered? my own selfishness of my need for this bible. would i be willing that these pages might blow to someone who might need them more then i? shattered by all the times i sit and do something other then read my bible - the very answers to all of life's questions, now literally blowing in the wind. how often do i talk about helping others get these very words into their hands and my words fall from my tongue, with hardly any action on my own part.
 all pages brought to me, and children playing at the top of the hill, i sit and start to figuring out what i have and what is still missing. the small girl who asked about "just using another bible" sits next to me.
"you write in your bible?" she asks picking up pages.
i show her my notes in the margins and tell her about the birthday that i received this bible. i tell her how this bible has been with me from the beginning of me walk with the Lord. with me when i lived in my car while traveling. with me while going to school both far away and right here in town. with me countless nights when i fell asleep with it on my chest, some nights sad with grief and some nights happy and full of life, but in all times, it helped me rest in God's pure joy. that yes this bible was very sentimental to me. yes, i loved it more then any other bible i owned.
but yes - she was right. a bible, is a bible.
that really it wasn't the sentimental life experiences i wrote in the margins. or the references on the inside cover that were a quick help in certain times of need, that i should be sad to loose, but that it was The Words of God. any bible, all bibles, should be treasured, but that our relationship with the Lord should be an even greater treasure.
i wondered, do i chase after God the way i chased after His words? do i set aside time to court Him in quiet communion? chase after Him personally?  hmmmm...
she and i sift through genesis, exodus and leviticus finding all the pages. we talk about what a special gift from God i received today in losing my bible, and getting it all back again. if only to remember how important it was to me - to others. that no, my notes in my bible weren't the most important thing, but that the words of the Lord are. while yes, my words in the margins were sort of like a journal of my walk with the Lord. and yes, it is okay to have that and feel attached to this particular bible because of them. we talked about how important the bible was without my notes in the margins. i told her it was a special gift to me to have her help me put God's words back together again and to share my bible with her.
"wasn't it funny that we were chasing genesis?" she asked?
"that we were chasing the answers?" i asked her? we both nod and continue to fill my bible up, with all the pages, in proper order.


Saturday, July 7, 2012

Respite Care

Respite care: (according to wikipedia) is the provision of short-term, temporary relief.
    do you have a retreat? do you have a need for a retreat? i know i sure do. in our house, when the tough gets going, i go to the bathroom - haahaah! not what your thinking! it's the only place i can go to for a solid 5 minutes of peace, quick prayer and a regrouping. (sometimes not a solid 5 minutes, but just enough time lol!) 
    a few weeks ago the kids and i decided to try our hand at creating an "out door room" with some random stuff that has been cluttering up our garage. all this stemmed from trying our hands at making a tee pee. looooong story, but the tee pee didn't ever come to be.
here is the before picture:
here are some after pictures with our sweet gracie gal given 'er a test drive =) :

this little respite site gets shade from early morning until about 1:30 p.m. in which case i'm inside cleaning up from the first half of the day and getting ready for the second half to begin. in other words, nap time. around 2:45 the shade moves back over from another tree and it's stays shady until night fall - or should i say, the next afternoon =) 
here's the great view:

and when my eyes start to focus inward and refreshment is in need:
i get a good clear view of the Son in which my eyes should not tarry from:

it's a wonderful spot to start my day, coffee in hand, bible on, yes - pop eye the sailor man sheets from my childhood. 'cuz aren't we supposed to have a childlike faith? haahhaah! i know - i know, but hey, i thought it was a cute reminder =)
but seriously? this is a spot i can easily watch the kids play, while i rest shortly, feel the breeze - a sweet gift from the Lord, and take a moment to just in the moment - God's moments.
it's a great spot for the kids to have morning and afternoon prayer and devotions - because we all need to be refreshed.
it's a great spot to have coffee with my husband when he gets home from work.
it's a great spot to sit and roast marsh mellows in the evening with friends, and a great place to gaze at God's stars. here's what our respite care site looks like at night with lanterns lit:
 see the moon above?
luke 5:16 but Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. 
thanks for taking a moment to pop in and visit us. might you consider creating for yourself your very own respite care? do you have a place to retreat? please feel free to share it here.
may you Know Love 

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Mothering is hard work!

<p>Okay, so mothering is some serious, hard work. Really, it's my dream job, but honestly, i thought it would be a breeze. I know, very nieave of me!
It takes diligence, perseverance, patience, consistence, self control; all of which, sadly, i lack. and that steadfast deep desire for our children to do & have & be better then us - not necessarily a good thing all the time - in fact, in can produce, in me personally, a hyper critical monster. I'm just being super honest here - after all, this a confessional blog and i might as well admit - or confess: it's simply not a cake walk or even a joy every single day.
I fail more times then i'd like to admit. More times then i thought was humanly possible, but then again, i'm learning that i am merely human. We all are. And praise God our children are so quick to forgive a humbled parent. To sit and pray with a momma when she ask, so that their may just be, two or more.
So all this to say, that while i struggle with my own weaknesses and failures, i know that God is Bigger then all of them. That He is healer, Comforter and Rebuilder. That when i am weak, it's then that i can be The Strongest. as long as i run to Him and not remain in myself, sitting in my weakness and sulking.
I have a ton a "blog catching up" that i'd like to do but here is where it may get tricky, my itty bitty baby netbook died! RIP good friend! So here is my first post using an app from my phone - i hope it works!! I wish i could see a good preview of this prior to actually posting it but i'm not sure that i'll be able to. And so goes the practice of patience and perseverance and submitting myself to whatever the Lord has in mind for me. Be it with a netbook or without, with a hot water heater or without, with a car that starts easy every time or without - yes! All in one week - during staycation! Lol!! We are praising God though, but seriously? Only after several days of horrible gripping.
May you be resting in the hands of Almighty God today, no matter what your walking through. You are Loved!
2 corinthians 11:9-10 but He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore i will boast all the more gladly about my weakesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why for Christ's sake, i delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when i am weak, then i am strong.